Fury of the Storm of Life

No Dragonforce pun intended - I've genuinely had a tough couple of weeks, but hopefully things will be better from now on.

So, on Wednesday just gone I lost the Vice President election at the Drama Society AGM. I tried my absolute best as well: posters, flyers, even a campaign video, all to no avail which was very painful. It's added the icing on a cake of trials and tribulations this academic year, with a lot of rocky patches for me to face. All I need is to fail in my bid to get on a capped module in my Options preferences and there's the big fat cherry on top. Nevertheless, I send my heartiest congratulations to the new Committee and I have total faith that they will steer the Drama Society ship through next year.

It's not getting any easier for two weeks either on my front. Titanic is now only a fortnight away. This has led to the most distressing of events: my hair has been lopped off in order to fit the role I have. It was a very sad occasion as I had been growing it for almost a year and now it's gone. But hey, it'll grow back. On with Titanic again - rehearsals are now comprising full run-throughs, with six in a row starting tomorrow and running until the Friday. Then it's performance week, two final run-throughs on Monday and Tuesday and then six actual performances from the 7th-10th March to hopefully six sell-out audiences. Add this to rehearsals starting for two of my modules and you wouldn't think that I actually had a reading week coming up and had no lessons.

I have also decided to give up smoking for Lent. A big decision and one that I know will be incredibly tough, but I am sure I can get through it. My only contact with tobacco is coming from the cigars I have to smoke on stage for Titanic - other than that I'm going to do my utmost to go cold turkey.

Does anyone reading this watch Take Me Out? It's a proper funny show. If you don't, essentially a single guy tries to impress 30 single women in the hopes of getting a date with them. Each girl has a box in front of them with a light. If they don't like the guy, they turn their light off, hence the catchphrase 'No likey, no lighty'. If every girl turns their light off it's a Blackout and the guy goes away single-handed. If he keeps one or more of the girls interested long enough for three rounds, he assures himself of a date and gets the chance to choose the girl himself by turning off THEIR lights. It's funny because some of the women are complete airheads and say the stupidest of things, and some of the guys are complete dicks too. If a date is secured, the couple go off for a date on an island called 'Fernando's', and everyone sees how they got on.

What gets on my nerves is there's one woman on there called Gracie who seems really lovely and genuine, yet she can't find the right person. She's had her light turned off several times by guys, including today when she was in the final two and still was turned down. I know that one man's trash is another man's treasure and everyone has their own tastes, but she really deserves a guy. However, what I like is that every single person has a job, is making a career for themself. And if there's one thing I cannot understand, it's why so many guys who may have a job, treat women right and are intelligent and funny are left single, whilst bums who sponge off the government and count the days until their 15 minutes of fame on The Jeremy Kyle Show are in relationships with people who could do a lot better than them.

Yeah, there's probably quite a lot of bitterness laced into that last statement: my wait for the right person is taking its toll on me and seeing couples is proving most frustrating at the minute. However, I know that she is out there somewhere and she will appear at the most random of times and steal me away. Who knows, we may know each other already, and our time is just not quite right. That would be a nice surprise.

Until then though, I can only wait, because she will appear. I admit I'm not the coolest, the funniest, the most handsome or the greatest, but I am very good at being myself. And one day, myself will be the perfect match for someone. Let's hope it's sooner rather than later, eh?

Laters xx

Procrastination at its finest

I should be doing an essay. It's due in a week today. So, I've decided to start by updating my blog. My mum once said to me I could 'make a tune out of a wet fish'. And it's true to an extent - I have a natural ability to hear a sound that is repeating itself over and over (a squeak as a tumble dryer spins, for example) and immediately start making up beats and little rhymes that go in between each 'squeak' until I have some rudimentary tune. And it's the same with essays - I have a brilliant ways of finding new and imaginative ways of wasting time I could be spending researching online, finding quotes in books and planning. I will do some today, I've actually had a rather productive day so far. But I knew I needed to update here first as I didn't yesterday.

I reshuffled my MP3 today. This is a time-consuming and slow exercise that would not be necessary if I had an iPod. Essentially, I have about 25/26GB of music on my computer at home. When I want to reshuffle my MP3, I have to choose what songs from this collection I want to fit onto a 4GB player. All my Iron Maiden would fill half of it. And because everything has to be in alphabetical order, I have to delete every folder and put them on again, one after the other. Also, to avoid disappointment, I have to work out how big each folder is and then add them up so I can fit it all on. Yeah, it's laborous, but worth it in the end. However, having a 160GB iPod would cover it all in one shot, and would set me up for life more or less - my music collection is only gonna grow.

Did you have snow this weekend just gone? We did, but then it rained and washed it all away. Still, on the bright side, we've avoided all the chaos and disruption that other places have had. Disruption which led to rehearsal on Sunday being cancelled, not that it mattered to me as I wasn't needed. Instead, I was a guest on the Drama Soc Radio Show on a Sunday. I loved it, always loved being on the radio and it was great to sit with a few mates for two hours in a small booth and chat rubbish.

One last thign before I go and actually DO some work: everyone should get one of these.

Laters xx

The cheeky sods.

Sonisphere's announcement last week was for their European festivals and not the UK one! They held true to their promise mind. Haha.

First Sunday rehearsal for Titanic for me, although I really should keep my room more organised. If I had, I  would have been able to locate my schedule and known that I was needed at midday. Not ten in the morning. I could have been in bed for another two hours instead of getting up at 7.30! But hey, what's done is done, and the rehearsal went well - Act 1 has been done in three weeks. Just the second one to do now in the next three weeks. I won't lie, my vocal chords are begging for mercy - they can't wait for March 10th when it's over. Speaking of March 10th, the show runs from Wednesday 7th until then. Tickets are £12, £8 for concession and it's being held at the Redgrave Theatre in Clifton. You should all come down and support us - the link is here.

My grades have fallen from last year - I'm currently averaging 58.71. Last year it was 65 exactly. Really need to up my game in this second semester if I am to keep up my high standards. So far I've achieved 50, 50, 58, 60, 60, 66 and 67 in my assessments - I'd like to get everything else this year at 60 or above if possible.

Loneliness is a bitch isn't it? I seem to find myself feeling it quite a lot again. No fault of anyone else's, I should stress - we all have our own lives to lead and we are all close to different people and closer to others. I just feel out of the loop with quite a few dfferent social groups. The one that's particularly painful is my church group - I miss all their crazy souls and I won't be able to go back to Gloucester for a while yet, what with rehearsals and the like. If they came to visit me though, that would be wonderful...

And finally, FINALLY, we have a good review for The Secret of Monkey Island, one of the plasy that we took up to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival this year. Just click here to view the whole thing.

Laters xx

Good intentions

I am going to try and update every week on Saturday/Sunday now. I don't know why I've got so slack recently, probably due to the fact that we are now back into lectures and along with rehearsals for Titanic, I am quite tired when evening comes around and thinking about what to write is a little bit beyond my reach. Although that doesn't account for the ten days in between my last blog post and lectures starting, for which I apologise.

Titanic is going well, I've literally just come back from another rehearsal: I have been cast in the musical as The Major, a sixty-something retired army officer travelling first-class to the 'States, for reasons unknown as they are not mentioned at all within the dialogue or the songs. It's a nice little acting role that I hope to do full justice with, although it has caused great amusement that the main basis for my role is Major Archibald Butt, who sailed on the actual ship and gave his place up on a lifeboat for some women and consequently went down with the ship. So I am unofficially Major Butt. Yeah. I found out today though that me and my fellow first-class men will be allowed to smoke real cigars on stage during the run, which is a very interesting development. Sadly the brandy we drink will be merely apple juice, but hey, you can't have everything, right?

Sonisphere are making an announcement this week, which is good because I can now weigh up if I want to go to it as well as Download or not at all. Download, by the way, announced 14 new bands this week, including Machine Head, Tenacious D, Lamb of God, DevilDriver and The Devin Townsend Project. It's a very strong lineup already and I'm looking forward to seeing how Sonisphere respond to this. I don't get the hate towards Chase and Status playing above Machine Head and below headliners The Prodigy on the Friday night though. Firstly, The Prodigy probably chose them as Special Guests, and that's fair enough. Secondly, Machine Head were offered to headline the second stage or play third on the main stage and chose the latter, so evidently they're happy with their position on the bill. Also, Chase and Status may have their roots firmly embedded in drum 'n' bass, but there are definite rock influences coming through and by rights that makes them suited to a ROCK festival. Or am I missing the point? Plus, metalstep, or dubstep metal, will be the big thing in 2012, I'm sure of it. Enter Shikari will be playing arenas by the end of the year and people like Skrillex will collaborate with many other metal bands and bring the new genre to the foreground. It's my belief that the aforementioned metalstep along with the 'djent' movement that began last year will lead the way as we go into 2013. Which we will, because the world isn't gonna end.

My course has started well, really enjoying being back and getting stuck into work. Looking at Hamlet in Shakespeare, which means I've now studied it for the third year in a row. A bit of a bore, you might think, but it's my favourite play of all time and I love studying it from any angle, however I admit I'm getting slightly sick of it now. Ways is gearing us towards performing Sarah Kane's 448 Psychosis which I can't wait to do. Creative Writing is as it sounds, and in Representing we looked at Clowning and how it is incorporated into political protests with comical yet considerable effect. So that' all good.

A small downer as I bring my post to a close - yesterday was the fourth anniversary of my Grandad's death. He battled with dementia for the last seven years of his life and it was horrible to see a man of his prescence and intelligence deteriorate into a shadow of his former self. However, I know that his legacy will live on and his memory shines ever brighter, and that one day I will join him and the rest of my family in Glory with his memory restored. I miss you man, but I never stopped loving you.

Laters xx

50 Not Out

Apparently this is my 50th point, so well done me for getting this far I guess.

Anyway, my first post of 2012 as well (I almost wrote 2010, then 2011 there, oops). How have your NY resolutions gone? Better than mine I hope! Well, officially, mine won't start until the 16th when the new semester kicks off. I know, I know, that's more or less allowing me an extra two weeks of indulging, but it's when I start to adhere to my new timetable. Hopefully with a routine to get into I can actually get into a lot of good habits and allow them to pe part of my lifestyle, not least getting up at 8am every morning. That'll be the big step, once I can do that and shift my sleeping pattern  back I'll be cruising.

Sonisphere are starting to piss me off, as it's now January 6th and they haven't made an announcement on who's playing. I guess it's more the people baying for bands that is annoying me - if they had half a mind they'd understand that various contracts have to be signed and then they can be revealed etc etc etc, and that Soni probably want to announce but simply cannot do so right now. I'm going regardless, it's a fantastic festival and I wouldn't miss it for the world.

I have a new hair colour - I am a brunette, although only the females of our species seem to notice, or at least point it out which I consider rather odd. I don't care if I sound really femenine on this point, but I love my hair currently - right length, right style. It mae me feel good about myself, makes me feel handsome, which boosts my self-confidence. That's a good thing, right?

Iron Maiden's 'The Final Frontier' is blazing out of my laptop speakers right now. It's easy to see why it was voted the best album of 2010 in Metal Hammer - 76 minutes of pure gold. Almost halfway through it, on Track 5 out of 10 currently. I find something new about it with every listen - it's great, such a layered album. You can't give this thing one listen because you'll barely scratch its surface. It's once you've played it through three or four times that you finally understand why it's a brilliant record. If they headline Sonisphere I will explode  with glee.

Feeling rather tired for some reason. I'm off for a lie down, then off out this evening.

Laters xx

2011: My Big Fat Review

...yeah, you can probably guess the title reference.

So, tomorrow, is New Year's Eve, meaning the day after that is New Year's Day. January 1st. 2012. As a result, I figured it would be cool to post my own personal review of the year. I wasn't too sure how to write this, but I have settled on a couple of Top Tens to get everything across. I would like to stress that neither of the lists are in any form of order, because I am thinking off the top of my head and as they come they will be written. So here we go!

Top Ten Moments of 2011

1. My wonderful relationship with Alex. Yes, there were tough times, but every relationship has them. And at the end of the day, I can look back on it and smile because it was absolutely fantastic.

2. The Edinburgh Fringe Festival. To perform up there on one of the world's biggest stages was a great experience, and to do so as the lead role in a play that sold out its allocation in two days was even better. It was brilliant to walk around and see all that was going on, and meeting a couple of famous faces along the way was an added bonus.

3. Sonisphere. Not only was it great to see everyone again that I had met the previous year, but the festival had run away with the lineup, a ridiculously strong bill that blew away anything Download and Reading/Leeds had to offer. Meeting new faces was awesome, as were some of the events that happened there. And as an added bonus, I came away with a Metallica beach ball, a very credible piece of gig memorabilia.

4. Passing my first year at university. In my four modules I attained 64, 65, 65 and 66. This rounds out at 65, a 2:1, and has given me great standing to go on and hopefully achieve a first at the end of my degree. Just a shame none of the marks count towards my final grade...

5. Visiting a centre in Bristol designed for deafblind children. One of the few perks that accomodated my summer job as a charity fundraiser, it was excellent to see what happened there and to see staff that were so passionate about helping children get as good a quality of life as possible.

6. Seeing Roger Waters, bassist from Pink Floyd, perform their eponymous album 'The Wall' in its entirity at the O2 Arena. To be given the chance to witness my favourite album of all time performed in a very similar vein to the original 1980/1 production, updated with new effects for 2011, was utterly superb. 'Comfortably Numb' reduced me to tears.

7. Our House, my ninth musical in eight years and my first with UWE's Centre for Performing Arts. Based around the hits of ska legends Madness, it was fast, fun and wonderful to be a part of. Again, I met some fantastic people whilst doing it, and I cannot wait to do Titanic next year in March. I won't miss the rasta wig though!

8. Performing 'By The Way' on stage at the UWE Drama Ball the day before I turned 19. It wasn't a huge thing, but I could finally be a proper frontman for all of 4 minutes, and the handshake from the guitarist as I walked offstage meant a lot.

9. The celebration in July for my parents silver wedding and my Dad's 50th. A really cracking day spent with family and friends, with laughs and memories galore. And again in 25 years, yes? Alright then!

10. Doing a couple of days of paid extra work on a low budget film. It was wonderful to see how it all worked and came together, and a great experience as a young actor to learn all the goings-on and what is expected of them. Although, I could have done without the early morning starts!

Top Ten Acts Seen in 2011

1. Iron Maiden

2. Slipknot

3. Volbeat

4. Slayer

5. Metallica

6. Airbourne

7. Tek One

8. Roger Waters

9. Black Spiders

10. Bill Bailey

The Biggest Loss of 2011

Rosie Kilburn. An old school friend who lost her three-and-a-half year battle with cancer in September, who had raised well into four, perhaps five figures for charity and kept everyone updated about her fight via her blog, The Knock On Effect. She taught me to keep going regardless of setbacks and to find the positives in everything, no matter how rock the road looks ahead. She was a fantastic actress and would have gone very far in life had she not been taken from us so early. The Order of Service from her funeral says 'Nineteen years live to the full'. Never has a statement been more true. She was an inspiration to everyone that knew her, and she will be missed dearly.

So, that's literally my review. I want to finish with:

Five Things to look forward to in 2012

1. The Olympics in London. As much as they've been criticised and as much as it looks like we will have overspent the predicted budget, in true British fashion we will show the world how it's done and give them the best Summer Games in history.

2. The continuing battle between Download and Sonisphere. Download have landed a massive blow with the announcement of The Prodigy, Metallica and Black Sabbath as headliners, and it's now up to Sonisphere to reply with gusto. If they announce excellent headliners as well, the battle will be well and truly on.

3. The 22nd December, if only to say I've survived three raptures, but also to sit back and smile as the predicted Mayan armageddon comes to nothing.

4. The end of my teenage life. As much as I complain and whinge, I'm actually looking forward to turning 20. Seems weird I know, but when you're younger than most of the first years, there's a part of you that really wishes you were older.

5. All the good times that will occur with all my wonderful friends. Each and every one of you means the world to me, and I can't wait to see what 2012 brings to us all.

To everyone, a Happy New Year. See you on the other side!

Laters xx

28 Days Later

The madness of the first semester is over. Two assessed performances, one 2,500 word essay and a lot of cigarolles in the space of seven days and I'm now home for Christmas. Just the small matter of a 2,000 word essay, a one-hour exam and a 5-minute presentation to think about over the festive period. I guess I gotta let the madness begin again.

Everything went well in the end - my freak show for Representing was received well, as were them all: every single person who had to undertake a solo performance did brilliantly. Then came the essay which a lot of people struggled with, myself included, but it was in on time and inside the word limit. Finally came the assessed performance for Ways that I directed, and aside from a slight lighting error that was due to a slip by the technician it all went smoothly too. The relief after that was over was brilliant, I can tell you.

It's weird that I'm now halfway through my undergraduate degree. It's amazing how quickly 15 months go when you're having fun. And fun is the word - uni is quite simply the greatest experience ever. So long as you get the right balance between your work and your social life, it will be the best three/four/five/ten years of your life, depending on your course. This semester I haven't quite got it right, I won't lie - it's why I've returned to Gloucestershire and felt tired, burnt out and struggled to wind down properly. Next semester will be different: I'm going to get myself into a proper routine and get the balance right again. It's my overall resolution. I've given up smoking for Christmas so when I return to uni in January I will find it easier to say no and be a social smoker once more.

The cat has just decided to sit down beside my laptop. Could be worse, could be sitting ON my laptop. Which he did attempt to do until I stopped him. I won't lie, I've missed my cat - as cute and cuddly Boris is, nothing beats the company of Raz. He's gone now :(

I'm also now involved in my 10th musical in 9 years, after a lack of male cast prompted me to answer (ironically) a distress call from the director of Titanic. Have to say though, it's great to be back in the CPA and performing again. Now to prepare myself for the intensive rehearsal period after Christmas - joy of joys haha.

I came up with the corniest line ever in church the other night - not happy at all with myself: 'Lord, we pray that this Christmas we would feel your prescence - as we open our presents'. Yeah, I couldn't quite believe I said it either. I quickly finished praying thereafter to avoid embarrassment.

So many gigs coming up to think about attending - Mastodon, Alestorm, Rise to Remain and Korn, all coming before the Jager Tour featuring Skindred, Therapy? and Black Spiders. I also need to find the money for Donington, Knebworth or both for 2012 - big year for music I reckon.

Right, that's about it. A Merry Christmas to all of you and a Happy New Year too, if I don't post again before then.

Laters xx